Here I stand outside the window longing to be asked inside
Until someone sees, being polite, though scared to death, they let me in

Woman wonders, "Who's your itchy friend?"
Woman says, "I thought he was with you"
Woman says, "I thought he was with you"
They slowly back away from him
At best he's very interesting
His brushes with success were just an accident
No one likes New Hampshire Man

Broken-hearted old man of New Hampshire
Flower-sniffing poet of New Hampshire
Charming witty drunk
Gate-crashing parasite
Self-pitying, embittered, morose New Hampshire Man

Woman wonders, "Who's your itchy friend?"
Woman says, "I thought he was with you"
Woman says, "I thought he was with you"
They slowly back away from him
At best he's very interesting
His brushes with success were just an accident
No one likes New Hampshire Man
No one likes New Hampshire Man