Lately all the songs I write
Are slow and on the mellow side
I used to stand on MTV,
But now they bring a chair for me
Let me get a tube of ointment
Let's rub my achy joints,
And turn my hearing aid loud,
And throw Depends into the crowd
This must be how it feels,
This must be how it feels,
To get old
If I try to play hard rock,
It'd probably put me into shock
Don't expect no big drum fills,
The drummer's lost his motor skills
So let's get to the point,
I'm as mellow as the Doobies
And when I head to the commode,
I just pray that I can go
And this must be how it feels,
To be old