Friends like you!
Who needs friends?
Friends like you!
Who needs friends?
Friends like you!
Who needs friends?
Friends like you!

You know ya left the window open and now the cat is gone
And my girlfriend says you're really sweet what the hell is going on?
You never gave me back my leather jacket and now it's out of style
And I warned you that that incense burner would set my house on fire

Now i'm not going to beat you up or drag you through the mud
I just want all my CD's back in the cases with the artwork still intact
Friends like you!
Who needs friends?
Friends like you!
Who needs friends?
Friends like you!
Who needs friends?
When friends like You-o-o-ou
Who needs friends?

Like when the guy punched you in Reno, had a lawyer for a dad
He got us mixed up and sued my ass Man that was really cool
Of you to fix me up with a girl from work that used to be a guy
When you lost all my money on the superbowl it made me WANT TO CRY!
I'm not going to beat you up or drag you through the mud
When the pending file sharing suit goes down
And why'd you need the whole Metallica catalog anyway?
We haven't liked them for 12 years
We like the Queers, we like beers
Stuck with Van Halen halfway through the Sammy years
Now it's over
YEAH!

You know ya left the back door open
AND NOW THE DOG IS GONE
And my girlfriend says you're really sweet
WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON?
And you never gave me back my leather jacket and now it's outta style
I should have beat you with your burkenstock when you set my house on fire!
FRIENDS LIKE YOU!
Who needs friends?
Friends like you!
Who needs friends?
When friends like you-o-o-ou
Like you-o-ou who needs friends?