I got old man farts that escape with a "Poof!"
Bubblin' in my bum since 1972
My farts will wrestle you down to submission
And that's how I blow away the competition
Farts are from dookie in your poop shoot
Mine announce their arrival with a "Toot-Toot!"
Some farts are wet. Mine are spicy
2 scoops of beans? That will do nicely.
V loves to be with the tenderoni's
And my cornholes labeled exit only
The male species keeps farts at ready
While ladies drop bombs silent but deadly
Farts been around since back in the days
The universe shot out the Milky Way! Yep!
So back up, back up and give me room to breathe
So I can stank up, stank up the whole rap industry

Your decision to air that out is real poopy
I'm feelin' real loopy cuz I almost dropped a dookie
Who me? I'm an asshole with a microphone
If I ever finish farting then I might go bone
But I can't, so everybody that's followin'
I drank a bunch of milk and I'm lactose intolerant
Hollerin' get ready for the stench
Put me in the game and I'll clear the whole bench
From more than a gallon gas
This ain't the type of smoke that you puff, puff and pass
Relax – I've got no more flatulence
I just want to welcome y'all to what's happennin'
So check out this noxious fume
All my fans gather round while I drop the boom!
Kablam! Honeys leave the room
As I melt those guys on the fruit of the loom