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We've all heard of Rudolph and his shiny nose And we all know Frosty whose made out of snow But all of those stories seem kind of... gay Cuz we all know who brightens up our holiday
Mr. Hankey the Christmas Poo Small and brown he comes from you Sit on the toilet here he comes Squeeze him between your festive buns
A present from down below Spreading joy with a "howdy ho" He's seen the love inside of you Coz he's a piece of poo
Sometimes he's nutty Sometimes he's corny He can be brown or greenish-brown (Mmm Mmm) But if you eat fibre on Christmas eve he might come to your town
Mr. Hankey the Christmas Poo He loves me I love you Therefore vicariously he loves you I can make a Mr Hankey too! (fart noise)
Cartman Well Kyle where is he?
Kyle He's comin'
Stan C'mon dude push!
Kyle Im trying!
Cartman Oh wait wait I can see his head!
Kyle HERE HE COMES!! (fart noise)
Mr. Hankey HOWDY HO! I'm mr. hankey the Christmas Poo Seasons greetings to all of you Let's sing songs and dance and play Now before I melt away Here's a game I like to play Stick me in your mouth and try to say Howdey ho ho yum yum yum Christmas time has come!
Sometimes he's runny Sometimes he's firm Sometimes he's practically water Sometime he hangs off the end of your ass and won't fall in the toilet coz he's just clinging to your sphincter and he wont drop off and so you shake your ass around and try to get it to drop in the toilet and finally it does
Mr. Hankey the Christmas Poo When Christmas leaves he must leave too Flush him down but he's never gone His smell and his spirit lingers on....
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