I saw three ships come sailing in
On Christmas day, on Christmas Day
I saw three ships come sailing in
On Christmas day in the morning
And what was in the ships, all three?
On Christmas day in the [laughing]
Shut up TURDS!
was in the ships, all three?
On Christmas day in the morning

The Virgin Mary and Christ were there [laughing]
On Christmas day, on Christmas day
The Virgin Mary and [more laughing]
Shut up TURDS!
and Christ were there
on Christmas day in the morning
And let us all rejoice amain [laughing]
I thought I told you to SHUT UP!
all rejoice amain
On Christmas day in the morning

Shelley is starting to get pissed [laughing]
On Christmas day, on Christmas day [more laughing]
Shelley got up, and killed them turds [laughing]
On Christmas day IN THE MORNING!

[Smashing piano noise]